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…and a ‘possum in the dishwasher
I can pull it off pretty well in public, being normal. In my real life as a designer, I seem okay. My big southern hair is usually in place, I often wear lipstick and matching clothes. I like to...
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Annabelle and the Trophy Wife
There’s a hillbilly saying in our house, that we really only say amongst ourselves. Okay, all of us don’t say it. Really, just my daughter, Cricket, and I say it. Sometimes she doesn’t even join...
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Not Tonight, Deer
Everything has a season. As a native Atlantan I come by this knowledge naturally. I was lucky enough to have a mother who knew the right way to do everything and did it better than anyone else,...
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Welcome, Neighbor!
Welcome, Neighbor You know those neighbors you hate? The ones whose dog never shuts up, who paints their house lavender, or is just a plain witch, bless her heart? I had one of those. Hated her. She...
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The Empress and the Snake Bite (or “turn it to Watercolors”)
The other day my friend, The Empress, came to stay at my lake place with me. She should really be called the Queen, but that conjures up visions of cross-dressing men and The Empress is definitely not...
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The Noms
A word about food. It plagues us women. I used to be a girl who forgot to eat. I was so slim I would whip off my clothes at any opportunity. My pantry contained paint cans, twist ties and car...
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Rear up a Child Correctly and She May Still Embarrass You in Front of Your...
Last Sunday our sermon was about child rearing. Since I am almost done with this, I used this time to doodle, play with the charms on my bracelet and admire my shoes. One thing he said, though,...
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Insanity of the Four Legged Kiind
My daughter, Cricket, is a psychology major. She feels this qualifies her to diagnose everyone and everything around. It seems like all things heretofore considered “quirky” now come with a...
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What Would Doris Day Say?
Occasionally, when my good family gets up to attend church, I decline. In past years, I sometimes made up a headache (not always made up after Saturday night), a sore throat or female malady. These...
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Close the Door, PLEASE!
I had a funny situation last weekend that has caused the Goose and me to laugh repeatedly. I saw an article the other day, written by a recently divorced man, giving advice to married men. Ironic, I...
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